As you can see from the total lack of art work appearing on my blog, I somewhat ended my visual. documentative relationship with the world. Not totally, but 40%. I kinda hate(d) art at the moment and what it has become to me, the water in the glass is filling up slowly, drop by drop and I am getting back to what I once used art for; escapism. I don't like to admit it but artists i knew or once did, art, people, media, art school, tutors (or lack of them), collectors, gallery's and the people walking around them turned me dislike it. Completley unnessary, 'saaaaaad', pretentious or what ever you want to call it, i'll agree (to a certain point) I made me become a person I wasn't and it did not make me happy. I gave it up. I gave the practice up. I never gave up the thoughts about work, spending 4 hours on a bus looking out the window taking photos of the surrounding thinking 'what if'.
I went to Canada, I went skiing for 3 months and became a Level 2 CSIA Instructor. What I found skiing is what I use to find within. The ability to escape, favorite brush (favorite skies; fat, thin) favorite colour (favorite run; double blacks, greens) favorite medium (favorite snow; chest deep powder, icy groomed runs etc) and it completely filled that gap.
I've no managed to say what I completely mean, I find it difficult putting head thoughts to paper, but I hope you can catch my drift. Art school was a waste of time, its just a fucked u convayour belt of shite, and if anyone comes across this post who is considering it, think about it over and over and over again ... until the answer becomes; do something real and exhilarating. Dare you.
I understand what you mean, I think. I go to the Maryland Institute College of Art, the people and "work" there that you come across can be a lot to handle/ tolerate. So far though, I know I've had a good experience. Try not to lose hope :) Perhaps your frustration with art is just a part of the process.
ReplyDeleteAlso, just wanted to let you know I moved back to my old blog, http://brightgreensweater.blogspot.com/ (I had been running "A Rough Sketch" before). Hang in there, and glad that you've found skiing!
When I try to rationalize it, I think it is part of the process .. then sometimes I think ... fuck the process! Also, I think if i want to be an artist, one day i'll have to be accepting of it so it doesn't waste to much energy! Hope your studies are going well, I will take a peak at your new blog!
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